Undergrad nostalgia photos

I received an email earlier from the department that the graduate office was asking for a copy of my 2nd semester/AY 2009-2010 Form 5. I had no idea where I had placed it and since it was last used three years ago, I was ready to bet that I have already lost it.

I was very eager to immediately go home after work because I wanted to search for it in all of my boxes of trinkets. As expected, I did not find it. However, I was happy to see several things associated with my undergraduate life in a shoe box I have stashed inside my drawer.

Nostalgia photos - ticket, notes, classcards and Form 5 - UP Diliman

In one of the binders with Cattleya fillers, I have several tickets and receipts in the cover. It has Mariah, Alicia Keys concert tickets, as well as the ticket for the first time that I’ve watched the UAAP Cheerdance Competition in 2003. I remember that it was sold to me by my PE instructor right that Saturday morning, and I dragged myself to Araneta to watch it in that jampacked Upper B section. After that event, I was more than determined to try my luck to be part of the team.

I also found several notes for my language classes. I even found a yellow pad paper with a French translation exercise given by a visiting professor — translate Nina’s ‘Love Moves in Mysterious Ways’ into French. It was a peculiar exercise and we couldn’t believe that we were made to translate that song. Turned out that he liked the song so much that he asked all of his assigned classes to translate it. But the paper that I found really funny was the one with my notes for our Latin class. I barely remember anything from that class except for “Mulus gemit” (The mule groans) and “Sumus agricolae” (We are farmers). It was my lowest numerical grade ever (at 3.00, I barely passed the class) but I was most happy to get that grade. Latin was excruciating.

And then, when UP used to issue tangible classcards (they now release them online through CRS), we had to sift through a pile of classcards and look for our names. What was embarrassing about it was that other students/classmates would be able to see your poor grades while looking for their own. News about who got a failing grade would readily spread out. Looking upon my classcards in my box at home, I saw my two INC classcards, one for English 11 (literature something, where I had to endure the extremely soporific” The Iceman Cometh“) and the other was Kas 1 (Philippine history). I was wondering why I did not tear nor throw them out.

Lastly, my first ever Form 5 in Diliman from 2003, containing my basic French classes and the badly spaced schedule of classes. I had classed from Monday to Saturday (except Wednesdays) and the breaks were quite long that I even had time to go to SM North and loiter before going back to school. Also, it was my most costly semester ever, at Php 6,266.50 when it used to Php 300/unit in school. Of course it was a different story nowadays when the tuition for undergrad drastically increased. I remember peeking at the Form 5s of the students I was with in the queue for payment and it was not strange to see theirs marked with Php 25,000 and up. Eeeek! That can already about 5 semesters during my time.

I counted the wrinkled and yellowed Form 5s from my undergrad and they were all present. Imagine I have kept each and every single one, including the summer classes but I managed to lose one of my graduate school Form 5. Some things do really change over time and one of them was diligence. LOL

And we retained the championship! UP Pep Squad is love!

I think even the heavens were not that happy with  the competition being held at SM MOA’s Arena. I thought I was in San Juan’s fiesta because the sky was throwing buckets of water with a wind machine. Good thing I had an extra shirt with me because I was quite drenched when we reached the Arena.

Outside the gate that is not Blue (I forgot the name), I saw some of my former teammates:

With my former teammates - UP Pep Squad alumni

Inside the Arena, I did not feel the usual goosebumps from anticipation and the infectious crowd I get from Araneta. It was that bad that I did not even notice the competition has already started.

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And my optimism over SM Tickets’ handling of 2012 UAAP CDC was crushed

Before sleeping last night, I had prepared two browsers and several notepads containing various info (e.g. user login, password, credit card number, etc.) just to be ready for the online tickets for the 2012 UAAP Cheerdance Competition.

It was slated to be distributed at 10 AM and I was already awake by 9:30 AM. Our tactic was for me to be the one purchasing online, while Mon will go straight to SM Bacoor near his place for the tickets. I thought that our plan was superb — turned out, it was not.

Gen Ad tickets for 2012 UAAP Cheerdance Competition

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Another annual problem: the elusive 2012 UAAP CDC ticket!

Next Saturday, September 22, will be the 2012 UAAP Cheerdance Competition. The week before, then, usually becomes the most grueling experience when it comes to  the acquisition of tickets.

I looked at my wallet and saw last year’s tickets. Exactly a year from today, I just realized how much pain I had just to get them. Similarly, exactly seven years ago in 2005, I had participated as part of the competing team for the first time.

UAAP Cheerdance Competition Tickets - 2012 UAAP Cheerdance Competition TIcket

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We indeed get what we give

I finally cried last Friday night because of this song. The earlier Tuesday, I was really running low and exhausted because of the stress I’ve been feeling and I almost cried. But last Friday, however, was for real. I did not exactly know why, but a large part can be attributed to frustration. I’ve been wanting to cry for weeks but I was bottling it up. It was a relief, though. I am now feeling much better.

So why this song? I loved this so much because it reminded me of the good ol’ days when I was still in high school. I was almost fourteen years old when this song came out in November 1998 and it was like an anthem for me. These lines had a nostalgic effect to me:

           But when the night is falling
           You cannot find the light, light
           If you feel your dreams are dying
           Hold tight

And then of course the wonderful chorus. Just like any teenager, I went through a rough phase of being rebellious and spiteful towards the world. I think that until today, I had carried on some of those anger. That defense mechanism you have against most of the people around you that you don’t trust, and true friends are/were the true people you can let your guard down with.

While typing this, I think I have an idea from where that frustration is coming from. I feel like I’m swimming in mediocrity. Not that I think that I’m mediocre because I can frankly say that I’m very grateful to be always in the company/group of the best people. Since I was young, from grade school until high school, I was always in the first section but not clearly the best in the class — even always teetering on getting the lowest grade in Math.

I’ve been in the best university in the Philippines but I was not the best French-speaker in the class. I was part of the best cheerleading/cheerdance group in the country (admit it, UP Pep is the best) but I was never the best dancer in the group and used to think that I did not deserve to be around that wonderful squad. I always have a nagging feeling that I must have cheated my way in each of these group and I did not deserve to be in their company one way or another. However, the persistent part of me always think that I deserved it.

It sucks to be mediocre. And now that I’m not admittedly giving my best, I already know what I might be getting. But that moment of random weakness I exhibited last Friday was a good outlet. I can now go back at being mad and abrasive. Just kidding. Seriously, I can’t always compare myself to my peers because I know that I also got the music in me. This must be just exam nerves.