A week has passed since I started working for my new job and what can I say? I honestly have a lot of things in mind, but I’m not too sure if I am at a liberty to voice out everything here. So I guess I would have just to be more discerning of what I would be posting when it comes to my work. It was not out of fear because we had a gag order or something like that, but it was a pretense of professionalism from my part. Kidding! All jokes aside, I am definitely enjoying with everything. 🙂
First of all, I’m very delighted to be finally inside this organization. As I have mentioned in my last post, I have posed my intent several times before finally getting a call for an examination and interview — and the rest was history. Barely two days in my job and I already had to push myself to learn some tasks on my own. I’m not saying that I was not told of what to specifically do, but it was more of a heightened expectation to learn things quickly and do well in the process. Conjuring the name of your university even in jest summons certain expectations. Nothing wrong with that because I love that kind of challenge. I never felt that kind of pressure since, I guess, the last leg of graduate school. However, it was different in the sense that it was usually a self-imposed pressure rather than a top-down one.
Upon entry, I was already given the task of handling a specific region where all security information and developments about that continent should be monitored closely. It has a real-life impact and I had to be more responsible than ever. Aside from that, I also had to learn other tasks specific to the team as a whole, and sometimes I feel a great deal of pressure (which is self-imposed) to perform and not to disappoint. I had a major faux pas on my fourth day, and I vowed never to commit the same mistake again. IT IS ON. There are REALLY lots of thing to learn but I know I had to have a good strategy before having a good handle of the situation.
Last but not the least, I did not have a proper ‘goodbye post’ for my previous company. Friday last week was my last day, and I was having mixed feelings and I had a constant lump in my throat whenever I try to speak. But we all have to eventually move forward, and it was not as if I’d be working overseas. Reading notes from my colleagues, I had a nagging feeling that people are actually thinking that THIS is my dream job. Is this my dream job? I’m not sure. Again, I’m not a big fan of labels and it was a BIG LABEL to peg something as your dream job. One thing’s for sure, though — I had to make this jump because this is where I feel I really belong. It might not be as gilded as people thought it out to be and I have already long shattered the rose-tinted glasses; however, I knew that being here felt right. I am afraid of failing again (i.e. my first NGO job) but I felt that the jump was necessary. I think I am in a better place/state of mind now to be finally here. I just have to keep my eyes on the prize and remind myself why I decided to take this path.